Geek shows and movies on UK TV in the coming week

There’s nothing that assuages the misery of shopping and memories of bills better than a belly laugh. The more you despise the commercialism of the Christmas season, the more you need the professionals.

What perfect timing, then, for the launch of the fifth season of comedy showcase, Live At The Apollo. In the first of six shows featuring the best comedians to make personal appearances in your sitting room, Jason Manford and Michael McIntyre take centre stage and control of your laugh-snorts, starting tonight at 9:30pm on BBC 1.

Catch your breath and soothe your sides quickly, though, because you’ll only have an hour and change to then flip over to More 4 at 11:10pm for another hour and a half of the wonderful stream of conciousness, circuitous route to the perfect punchline of Eddie Izzard’s Circle stand-up show.

Then on Sunday, for Who fans of all ages, the new animated series of Doctor Who, Dreamland, will gather its six episodes of 7-14 minutes each and show them all together as a feature event on BBC 2, 5th December at 10:00am. We, personally, preferred the style of the previous animated series, but the monsters here do look like they’re as impressively cel-shaded and, truth be told, we’d watch a stick figure version of The 10th Doctor, as long as he was voiced by David Tennant.

If all that doesn’t raise you from the depths of any self-induced or high street-inflicted pre-holiday funk, we have a CV of one Mr Bob Cratchit you may want to consider hiring. Just state your preference of PDF or plain text.

Or, have a look at the list of movies airing over the weekend and a bit beyond. There’s something for all tastes and moods, to raise your spirits, invite new ones in, and keep the buying blues at bay.

Please also note: the ordinal numbers for dates will help you scan through this simple list with your browser’s search function. Enter ‘5th’ in your browser’s Find box or window to highlight and/or tab through all movies shown on Saturday. Enjoy!

Batman BeginsOn: ITV1    Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 8:30pm

Ben-HurOn: Sky Movies ClassicsDate: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 12:20pm (and 8:15pm)

Beverly Hills CopOn: Sky Movies Christmas     Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 09:55am (and 8:00pm)BigOn: Sky Movies Modern Greats  Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 4:05pm

BowfingerOn: Sky Movies ComedyDate: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 2:35pm (and 1:20am 5th Dec, 8:15am & 4:40pm 7th Dec)

Charlie And The Chocolate FactoryOn: ITV2Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 5:10pmClose Encounters Of The Third KindOn: Sky Movies Modern Greats   Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 10:10am

Cool Hand LukeOn: FiveDate: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 4:55pm

ComaOn: TCM    Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 9:00pm

Crash (2004)On: more4  Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 9:00pm (and 00:50am 6th Dec)

DarkmanOn: Sky Movies Action/Thriller  Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 10:00pm

DaylightOn: Sky Movies Action/Thriller    Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 10:30am (and 4:20pm)DeathwatchOn: Film4   Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 11:35pm (and 00:35am 6th Dec Film4+1)Demolition ManOn: Sky Movies Action/Thriller    Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 12:35pm (and 8:00pm, 11:25pm 11th Dec Sky Christmas)DesperadoOn: Watch   Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 10:00pm (and 11:00pm Watch+1, 9:30/10:30pm 6th Dec Watch/+1)

Drop Dead FredOn: LIVING  Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 10:00am Nad 11:00am/noon Living+1/+2)Enemy At The GatesOn: Film4Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 9:00pm (and 10:00pm Film4+1)E.T. The Extra-TerrestrialOn: ITV2  Date: Saturday 5th December 2Time: 5:05pm (and 11:10am 6th Dec)Galaxy QuestOn: Sky Movies Comedy  Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 11:00am (and 6:15pm)

Harry And The HendersonsOn: Sky Screen 1  Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 06:00am (and 4:50am 6th Dec)Hellboy II: The Golden ArmyOn: Sky Movies Sci-Fi/Horror  Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 1:40pm (and 9:00pm)High FidelityOn: Sky Movies Indie    Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 2:00pm

Home AloneOn: Sky Movies PremiereDate: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 5:30pm (and 6:30pm Premiere+1, 9:30am & 3:00pm 6th Dec Sky Family, 2:10pm & 11:30pm 8th Dec Sky Christmas, 9:15am & 6:15pm 9th Dec Sky Family)

Hot Shots!On: Sky Screen 1   Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 11:40pmHow The Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)On: Sky Movies Family  Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 07:15am (and 2:45pm, 3:30pm 5th Dec, 9:35am 6th Dec, 8:40am 9th Dec Sky Christmas)Hush…Hush, Sweet CharlotteOn: Sky Movies Classics    Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 10:20pm

Indiana Jones And The Temple Of DoomOn: Sky Movies Modern Greats    Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 12:20pm (and 8:00pm)

Indiana Jones And The Last CrusadeOn: Sky Movies Modern GreatsDate: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: noon (and 8:00pm)

Jaws 2On: Hallmark  Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 9:00pm (and 10:00pm Hallmark+1, 1:50/2:50pm 5th Dec Hallmark/+1

JunoOn: Sky Movies Comedy  Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 07:30am (and 8:00pm)

Jurassic Park IIIOn: Sky Movies Family    Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 06:30am (and 9:40pm)

Kindergarten CopOn: ITV2   Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 1:35pmKung Fu PandaOn: Sky Screen 1   Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 08:00am (and 4:55pm)

Last Action HeroOn: Five   Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 3:50pm

Midnight RunOn: Sky Movies Comedy  Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 11:40pm

Monty Python’s The Meaning Of LifeOn: Sky Movies Christmas     Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 01:45am

Ocean’s ElevenOn: ITV2Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 10:30pm (and 9:00pm 7th Dec)

PredatorOn: Sky Movies Modern Greats   Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 10:00pm

Predator 2On: Sky Movies Action/Thriller   Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 2:30pm (and 11:40pm)

Raiders Of The Lost ArkOn: Sky Movies Modern GreatsDate: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 12:35pm (and 8:00pm)

RayOn: ITV1   Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 11:00pm

Richard Pryor Live On The Sunset StripOn: Sky Movies Comedy  Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 10:00pm (and 3:00am 5th Dec)

Ride With The DevilOn: Sky Movies Drama   Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 11:30am (and 12:40pm)

RocknRollaOn: Sky Movies Indie  Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 1:35pm (and 8:00pm, 11:25am & 8:00pm 10th Dec)

Role ModelsOn: Sky Movies PremiereDate: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 10:30am (and 11:30am Premiere+1 & 10:00/11:00pm Premiere/+1 and daily at similar times through 12th Dec)

Rumble FishOn: Sky Movies Drama  Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 01:15am

Star Wars: Episode VI – Return Of The JediOn: ITV1    Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 3:50pm

Strange DaysOn: Sky Movies Modern Greats   Date: Sunday 6th December 2009Time: 01:55am

Sunset BoulevardOn: Sky Movies Classics   Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 4:40pmSweeney Todd: The Demon Barber Of Fleet StreetOn: Sky Movies Drama   Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 11:10pm

TakenOn: Sky Screen 1  Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 10:00pmTestamentOn: Sky Movies Sci-Fi/Horror   Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 09:40am (and 2:50pm)

The Bank JobOn: Sky Movies Christmas  Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 9:45pm

The Big LebowskiOn: Sky Movies Modern Greats   Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 11:55pm

The Blues BrothersOn: ITV4Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 10:30pmThe Breakfast ClubOn: Sky Movies Modern Greats    Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 10:35am (and 4:40pm)The Dark KnightOn: Sky Screen 1   Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 9:00pm (and 3:25pm 6th Dec)

The DuellistsOn: Sky Movies Indie  Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 6:00pm (and 00:20am 5th Dec, 10:30am 9th Dec Sky Christmas)

The GameOn: Sky Movies Action/Thriller  Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 5:40pm (and 2:05am 7th Dec)

The Godfather Part IIOn: Sky Movies Modern Greats  Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 06:20am (and 2:45pm)

The Great EscapeOn: Sky Screen 1    Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 1:55pm

The In-LawsOn: TCMDate: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 1:00pm (and 5:00am 6th Dec)The Italian Job (1969)On: Sky Movies Christmas   Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 1:55pm (and 8:00pm)

The JackalOn: BBC 1   Date: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 11:45pm

The Last StarfighterOn: Five    Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 2:00pmThe Lost BoysOn: TCMDate: Friday 4th DecemberTime: 9:00pmThe Silence Of The LambsOn: Sky Movies Modern Greats  Date: Sunday 6th DecemberTime: 10:10pm

Total RecallOn: ITV2   Date: Tuesday 8th DecemberTime: 10:00pm

TremorsOn: ITV4   Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 10:00pm (and 11:00pm 7th Dec)Tropic ThunderOn: Sky Movies ComedyDate: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 1:00pm (and 9:30pm, 6:10pm 7th Dec Sky Christmas)

WarGamesOn: Virgin 1   Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 9:00pm (and 10:00pm Virgin+1, 5:00/4:00pm 6th Dec Virgin/+1)

What Ever Happened To Baby Jane?On: Sky Movies Classics   Date: Saturday 5th DecemberTime: 8:00pmX-MenOn: Sky1    Date: Friday 4th December 2009Time: 9:00pm (and 10:00pm 6th Dec & 10:00pm 9th Dec Sky2)