The Cyberpunk 2077 team has revealed the full patch notes for the game’s recently released 1.2 update and all we can say is “wow.”
There’s no use trying to breakdown the entirety of this patch since it contains over 500 updates, fixes, changes, and improvements. I highly recommend that you check out the (mostly) full rundown of the update if you’ve been waiting for that massive Cyberpunk 2077 patch that will finally make the game significantly more playable. This won’t be Cyberpunk 2077‘s last update, but it feels like the first of the game’s updates that are trying to do more than just put out the biggest fires.
If you’re looking for the highlights, though, then I’ve got you covered. Here are the best, biggest, and weirdest patch notes that I’ve found in the Cyberpunk 2077 1.2 update so far.
Cyberpunk 2077 Patch 1.2 Notes: The “WTF?” Fixes
“Player can no longer cancel fall damage by performing a slide action when about to fall from greater heights.”
If you’re like me, this is one of those things that you didn’t even realize was possible in Cyberpunk 2077 but now desperately want to try. Based on some videos that I’ve seen of this technique, it’s actually possible to survive some insane falls via this method but your survival is based on the specifics of the fall itself and your mastery of the technique. Honestly, they should just turn this technique into an official in-game modification ability.
“It is no longer possible to perform Gorilla Arms finishers against civilians.”
Cyberpunk 2077‘s latest patch notes make it clear that civilians in Night City have it kind of rough. I’m not entirely sure what the basis of this particular change is, but I kind of hope that they put it in there just to give the poor people of Night City a break by not letting you beat them to death quite so easily with your mechanical fists.
“Extending the sliding ladder won’t result in player’s death if they are below it.”
I’ve never actually seen this happen in Cyberpunk 2077, but the fact that it could happen is downright hilarious. Super-powered characters being killed by tiny bumps in video games is a guilty pleasure of mine, and I love the idea of being killed simply because your character is too stubborn to move out of the way of a ladder.
“It is no longer possible to use guns near the arcades during the Raymond Chandler Evening fistfight. // You can no longer pull an Indiana Jones in El Coyote Cojo.”
Ok, I’m actually a little upset by this one. As pointed out in the patch notes, it’s actually kind of hilarious that this was possible as it plays into the player choice element of the game. You could argue that too many of these glitches add up to be more than an amusing annoyance, but I think this one might have been funny enough to leave in the game in some form.
“Fixed multiple issues during sex scenes”
CD Projekt Red doesn’t give any additional details about this patch note, but I really wish they would. Just how many issues were there in these sex scenes? I’ve heard some people say the animations used in these scenes were awkward (which is true), but I’ve also heard reports that players were falling through floors and clipping through objects during those sensual moments. I’m sure fans will waste no time telling us everything that’s different about them when this update hits.
“Kerry’s bathrobe is no longer incorrectly attached to his lower part of the body.”
I had to look this one up, and I’m glad I did. It seems that Kerry’s bathrobe suffered from this strange glitch that made the bottom of it operate independently from the rest. I have no idea what causes it, but it kind of looks like it’s accounting for the proportions of a gentleman with much wider hips. Check it out for yourself:
“Fixed incorrect censorship when playing a copy of the game from a region other than Japan while the console region is set to Japan or language to Japanese.”
This isn’t the strangest patch note, but it’s one I didn’t know about. Apparently, the Japanese version of Cyberpunk 2077 censors some of the sex scenes and a few of the more violent moments. I’m genuinely curious how many people were accidentally playing the censored version of the game due to this issue and didn’t even realize it.
“Fixed an issue where pedestrians could get teleported after being hit by a vehicle.”
I still just want to know where those civilians went from both a design and lore perspective. I’m imagining that there’s a pile of civilian bodies lying around somewhere like at the end of The Prestige.
“In The Pickup, it’s no longer possible to trigger both scenarios at the same time: a peaceful deal with Maelstrom and fighting them.”
Cyberpunk 2077 Patch 1.2 Notes: The Oddly Specific Fixes
“Fixed an issue where dumping a body in the trunk started the vehicle’s engine.”
Ok, I ran into this one several times during my Cyberpunk 2077 journey and just convinced myself that it was a feature. At the very least, I feel like Elon Musk may make a car that automatically starts when it detects a body in the trunk for the convenience of the evil billionaire with goons on the go.
“The TV in Tom’s Diner can no longer be destroyed. If a player destroyed it before this update it will now be fixed and the news will be displayed correctly to progress Playing for Time.”
I also didn’t know this was possible, but it’s hilarious to imagine a player going around and destroying every TV in town only to find that they can no longer progress through the game as a result of their actions. Honestly, who discovered this one?
“Fixed an issue that caused NPCs to trip over other NPCs too often.”
It’s the “too often” part of this one that gets me. Who determined that the amount of NPC tripping going on was well beyond the acceptable parameters for such a thing?
“Fixed a rare scenario where the painting wouldn’t appear in the drop pod in Space Oddity/Space Oddity no longer spawns multiple paintings blocking the quest’s progress.”
I love the idea of largely useless paintings causing so many problems during one of Cyberpunk 2077‘s biggest missions. You just get the feeling that this is the little problem that made the team realize what a mess Cyberpunk 2077 was at launch.
“Fixed an issue where A Like Supreme could get blocked if player rushed to the toilet to take a pill before finishing a conversation with Nancy.”
This one just brings to mind a million instances in open-world games where you realize that QA testers should consist of trolls and video game speedrunners who are able to find absolutely every little thing you can do to ruin a game.
“Car lights will no longer stay on after the car battery dies in Ghost Town.”
How far down the list was this particular problem? Either this is a sign that the team is ready to move on to more minor fixes or this problem was a particular sticking point with someone on the team.
Cyberpunk 2077 Patch 1.2 Notes: The Cat-Related Fixes
“Cat food needed to adopt Nibbles can now be bought at several food shops around Night City”
While I actually like the idea of specific items only being available in specific shops in Night City, the fact of the matter is that Nibbles doesn’t have time for such role-playing concepts. Nibbles needs food, Nibbles needs love, and Nibbles needs it on their time, not yours.
“Fixed an issue in Nocturne Op55N1 where petting the cat would play without dialogue. // V will now properly address the cat, even without Misty’s answer.”
You WILL properly address Nibbles, V. Thank you to the Cyberpunk team for fixing such a glaring omission. Clearly, this is the reason why the game was delisted from the PlayStation Store.
Cyberpunk 2077 Patch 1.2 Notes: The Welcome Fixes to Strange Problems
“Fixed an issue where V could get stuck in empty buildings when exiting a vehicle parked close to a wall.”
This one happened way more often than it ever should have. This scenario is also common enough to really make you wonder how this problem escaped the testing process.
“Jackie no longer shouts ‘Nice shot!’ when V kills enemies while in stealth mode.”
Truth be told, I actually kind of love that Jackie couldn’t hide his enthusiasm during these instances, but it’s hard to deny that his piercing shouts did kind of ruin the immersion of these moments.
“Collisions will no longer fail to stream in randomly during driving, which could lead to V driving into buildings and falling out of the world.”
I get that Cyberpunk 2077 isn’t supposed to be GTA, but it sure will be nice to be able to collide with something without having to worry about disappearing into the void where those civilian bodies go.
“NPCs will no longer stay blocked on traffic lanes while in fear.”
Cyberpunk‘s poor NPCs will finally be able to move out of the middle of traffic which is good for you, good for them, and good for the city’s cleanup crew who have seen too many horrors.
“NPC hit by a car will now immediately run in panic/Added different animation variations for pedestrians running away from a vehicle.”
Some saw this problem as a sign that Night City’s NPCs just don’t care, but I think these patch notes make it clear that they wanted to run away and just didn’t have the ability to. It’s a real “have no mouth and must scream” scenario.
“V’s hands are now correctly displayed on a steering wheel while driving”
V gets a few animation fixes in this upcoming patch, but this is one of my favorites. I don’t know why it was so difficult to properly animate V using a steering wheel, but I’m glad we’re moving past the days when you’ve got to wonder what the character’s hands are supposed to be doing.