Geeks Vs Loneliness: Stepping Stones

Contains mild spoilers for Avengers: Infinity War

Someone has to be the Bucky Barnes of the universe. That unfortunate soul for whom it never stops raining. The guy without the gifts. Winter really did bite him on the backside.

Bucky began with such bright horizons before falling off a cliff into a life lag. Woke some decades latter to find that he was wired to a machine that told him where to go, what to do. How to behave and what to think. Sound familiar?

Everyone around him is exploding into brilliance, a special club celebrated and feared as they hone their prowess and save the universe. All while poor Bucky carries out a royal assassination unwittingly before hiding out in Wakanda hoping that the Avengers (and the universe) just leave him the hell alone. Then look at what happens when they drag him into the Thanos argument. POOF! Dust on the breeze.

Nobody strives to be the Bucky Barnes of the world. We’d rather be Captain America, T’Challa or Captain Marvel. Strutting our stuff to our own internal 80s disco as Star-Lord. Or want to just to Hulk out now and again to release the pent up emotion that every day life stresses and anxiety causes (recommended under controlled circumstances such as the gym or gaming).  

Bucky Barnes is where I land on the MCU spectrum. Battered by life, directed by the manipulations of others. Missing essential parts and festering over past actions that I struggle to let go of. I look for quiet in a noisy world.  I suspect that’s true of many of us.

I can feel that lag dragging at my heels right now. So I’m going back to the end of 2018, to a GvL guest article that focused on setting goals – Looking Ahead and Keeping Busy. Our guest was focusing on moving forward from a difficult time caused by post partum depression and had found that setting small stepping stones of brightness helped them face the future.

I’m not suggesting we all bust some Smooth Criminal manoeuvres on glowing paving stones, though if it helps then go for it. Back then I posted 3 events I was looking forward to. The first – novel boot camp in February – was brilliant in directing my creative energies into focusing on the project I’m working on. Which I might finish sometime in 2023 the rate I’m going!

The second is still on my list – Avengers: Endgame. I booked my IMAX tickets at the weekend and this is the first of my glowing paving stones to hop gleefully onto. I know it was on several other peoples’ lists back in 2018 too, a collective bright point.

The third – a new Joe Abercrombie novel – is still a way down the line and helping to illuminate that horizon. In the interim I am wallowing in V.E. Schwab as an appetizer.

I’m wondering how you are doing with your bright spots on the horizon. What new dates in the diary you have added in the past three months since we first talked about this. I’m adding some live music to my calendar in May to get out and shake my tail feather, knowing it always leaves me smiling.

May is looking like a super month for box set binging. There’s Lucifer kicking off on the May 8th and guaranteed to bring a twinkle to the eye. Thank the gods of Netflix for picking this up to hopefully wrap up in a satisfactory conclusion. That day is really spoiling us, bringing as it also does Good Omens to Amazon Prime. I’m not sure I’ll be leaving the house for several days!

Finally – planning into 2020 – I am looking forward to my ultimate Jared Leto fix as Morbius. I might have over a year to wait for this one but I’ll be skipping all the way to the cinema when the day comes to see that glorious visage 60ft tall.

Thinking ahead, what bright spots are you looking forward to, to get over those lags in your timeline? What glitters on your horizon or what could you add to make it just that little bit easier to step into the future?

Thanks as always for reading.