The 18 most awesome things Rainbow’s Bungle has ever done

Be warned: number 16 on this list could well bring your entire day to a standstill...

I love Bungle from Rainbow, by which I mean I hate Bungle, he’s a div. But he’s definitely the best character in the show, and if anyone disagrees with me, I’ll meet you for a fight outside Home Bargains in town.

Now then. The following clips never fail to reduce me to hysterical tears, even though I’ve watched each one approximately 5000 times.

1. Refusing to get naked

In the episode Bungle’s High And Mighty Day, Bungle decides he’s better than everyone else because he (mistakenly) thinks he’s the only one who’s been invited to Sooty’s party. As well as kicking Geoffrey out of his own bedroom and calling everyone else knobs for eating toast, Bungle flat out refuses to share a bath with those plebs Zippy and George. I can see his point to be honest – as if he’d fit in that bath? What would he end up sitting on?

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2. Silent but deadly

This episode is called What’s Wrong With Bungle? To which I would have to answer – so, so many things. One of the things wrong with Bungle is his waking up one morning and deciding he isn’t going to bother talking to anyone ever again. This lasts until the end of the episode, when he makes everyone a trifle for no apparent reason.

3. Screwing up his own picture

You have no need for logic when you’re Bungle. Need the whole table to yourself? George being a dick and demanding to have an eighth of the table? Never fear, simply destroy whatever it is you were doing in the first place, and use it as a rudimentary weapon.

4. Being fed up and cross!

This is my favourite ever Bungle rant. Bless him, he tries so hard to be angry and scary, but just ends up being about as scary as, well, me. To be fair, the episode isn’t called Naughty Zippy for nothing. Zippy is being a complete arse. I’m surprised Bungle doesn’t eat him.

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5. Going in a mega strop because he can’t be Jill

Yes, you heard me right, Jill. Jill from Jack and Jill. Specifically, because he doesn’t get to wear a pretty hat anymore. Every time, every single time (and that’s around six times a day) I watch Bungle giving everyone else the cold shoulder I collapse laughing and a bit of wee comes out.

6. Doing kinging

Hands up who thinks Bungle should be king in real life? Okay, I do not have my hand up, that would be silly. Luckily, in this episode we are treated to a glimpse of this terrifying, dystopian reality.

Bungle’s first and only job as king? To ban all food apart from jam tarts, unless someone pisses him off in which case they have to live on bread and water. However, his reign of terror comes to an abrupt end when he learns he’ll have to marry Jane, who is fat for no real reason.

When she tries to snog him, he just sort of cries a bit.

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7. Being Superman

A big letter B! Because B is for… Bellend!”

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s a great big hairy bear clutching a sheet of yellow paper to his chest. In real life, Zippy has hogged all the toys, and Bungle thinks that imagining he’s Superman when Zippy’s not even in the room is somehow going to solve this problem.

8. Wallpapering over the door

Not only does he wallpaper over the door, but over the windows as well. On what planet would you do that? Anyway, it’s Geoffrey’s fault for letting him anywhere near wallpaper paste. Somehow, Geoffrey thinks it’s a good idea to let Bungle attempt to decorate the bedroom all by himself. Geoffrey, haven’t you ever seen Rainbow?

9. Ballet dancing

Complete with blue tutu, and introduced by Geoffrey in a wig who looks uncannily like Lionel Blair. Also he’s carrying a thing of flowers around while dancing, like Morrissey.

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Sorry about this page break. We’ve had people reporting that, due to the number of videos in this list, it’s been crashing the Safari browser in particular. We’re not quite sure what the problem is, but hopefully putting this page break in might help.

In not, doubly sorry. Now: back to Bungle.

10. Making Hitler Cat even worse

Geoffrey draws a mournful looking cat. The cat looks like Hitler. Of course Bungle, in his infinite wisdom, has to ruin the cat even more by adding random bits of string to its face. Maybe it doesn’t look like Hitler to everyone, but at best it looks like a sad cat with a bit of string glued to its face.

11. Instantly needing the loo

In the space of 0.00001 seconds, Bungle goes from being absolutely fine to being about to piss himself. It’s like he’s suddenly remembered that he needs the loo. And even when he finally does twig that he needs to have a wee, he’s too scared to go wee in the bushes, even though he’s a bear. He does, however, refuse George’s offer of a potty, earning him half a man point. Also, that hat’s clearly stapled to his head.

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12. Grabbing Geoffrey’s tits

You know what will cheer everyone up? Molesting Geoffrey! It’s what Batman would do.

13. Pretending to be Jane

Bungle does love Jane. The only thing he loves more than Jane is pretending to be Jane. The clothes and the wig are from his Jane shrine, which is full of her old clothes and pants and hair. I must say, he’s got Jane’s moves spot on. Also, shut up George, no one in their right mind is watching you being Freddy, not when Bungle’s being Jane.

14. Assembling things like a proper man

Instructions? What are they? Pah, I don’t need instructions. Anyway, it’s not my fault, it’s made wrong. It was probably made by a woman. Make us a cup of tea Geoffrey, there’s a good girl.

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15. Having a nervous breakdown over stuffing mix

Making Paxo is no laughing matter.

16. Patching Jack’s ‘nob’

The entire second verse of Jack and Jill was changed just so Bungle could do this, I am absolutely sure of it. Instead of singing “He went to bed and bound his head with vinegar and brown paper”, as is the standard, the Rainbow gang plump for the pre 20th century version – “…Old Dame Dob who patched his nob with vinegar and brown paper.”

I bet you never thought you’d ever read that paragraph on Den Of Geek.

Anyway, this whole thing is a deliberate set up so Geoffrey can say to Bungle “If you’re wondering what Jack’s nob is Bungle…” much to the sniggering delight of the crew.

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Okay, I guess this one isn’t entirely Bungle’s fault, but it would have been wrong of me not to include it.

17. Inventing his own language

In the episode Geoffrey Learns French, we find out that Geoffrey has a French penpal/girlfriend, and she’s coming to visit for the weekend. Upon hearing that ‘Michelle’ speaks a different language, Bungle is inspired to invent his own language on the spot, causing him to sound like he’s possessed.

18. Pretending to be Geoffrey’s French girlfriend

Later on in Geoffrey Learns French, Bungle is given the task of pretending to be Michelle so Geoffrey can practice his French. As you can see, he does a less than sterling job, instead sounding like an extra from Carry On Abroad.

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