Sons of Anarchy: Poor Little Lambs Review

Kurt Sutter sure knows a lot of famous people. How do I know? They show up in Sons of Anarchy. Even if they are not suited to the show. Donal Logue as an out of control, prostitute (accidently) killing, revenge seeking addict? Glorious. Walton Goggins as a (monologue addicted) transsexual with a killer rack? Tedious, but still awesome. Marilyn Manson playing a flabby Neo-Nazi with no affect? It works. Courtney Love as the private school teacher? Seems like a waste of a cameo, but okay. Malcolm-Jamal Warner as a gang banger? Amusing. Joel McHale banging Gemma? Just, no. Dave Navarro as a Biz Lat banger? Please stop.

My concern for this, the last season, is that Sutter will try to cram as many guest stars as possible into each episode. Stop. Seriously. Stop. On one hand you have such an ocean of skill in your main cast, they can easily compensate for the less experienced cameo players. But why bother? At this point name dropping famous faces is just a distraction. I don’t want to watch Courtney Love deliver four lines of dialog, and be mildly piqued by the fact that I am looking at a former rock star. No, I want to watch Gemma chew up the scenery and threaten to jam a latte up some soccer mom’s butt. Let it go, Sutter. Your main cast can take this show home without the sideshow.

Speaking of Gemma, I am less disturbed by the frequency of her imaginary talks with Tara, and more disturbed by the fact that it looks like this season is really going to be Tara’s big “I told you so.” Violence only begets more violence?

Get the fuck out of here.

Hey, remember that time that I said vengeance was not just some easy fix? Yeah. Is Jax ever going to figure this out?

Someone (probably Jury) has ratted on the Sons to Lin and he wastes no time getting even. First, the Chinese chuck a grenade through the ice cream shop. Then they steal the Mayan’s guns. Then they go to Nero’s hooker lounge and literally gun down everyone. Good thing Jax’s kids were home and Gemma had already left to cart Juice’s crazy ass to her father’s house so he can lay low.

The blonde hooker/Madame that Jax was sticking it to last season was not so lucky.

As if that wanton slaughter was not enough, it came at the end of a very long day for the Sons. First, they have to rescue the wife of a sexually deviant pastor they killed in the season premier from a submerged car. Then Tig takes a blast of buckshot to the stomach, but manages to muddle through, buoyed by his blossoming relationship with Venus. Later, two Charming cops trail Jax to a meeting with the Neo-Nazis, and accidently get gunned down. Sheriff Tight Pants is all hot and bothered by the rising tide of violence in her town, and no amount of handholding with Chibbs is going to make her forget that she’s waist deep in shit and sinking fast.

Jax could tell her a thing or two about wading through crap. Charming is like a nexus for pandemonium. At one point, Bobby asks Jax, “Remember when our biggest problem was figuring out which Mayan to kill?” And he has a point.

Their lives have not only spiraled out of control, life has become so chaotic and convoluted, it has started to defy the bounds of plausibility. How does all this shit keep happening? I understand the concept behind causality, but give me a break here. What seasoned banger would gun down an entire brothel, hookers, clients, and all? That kind of body count will get the attention of both cops and feds. As August Marks would say, it is bad for business. And what is bad for business is bad for plot. C’mon, Sutter, you don’t need to blind me with fireworks when you have that much talent.

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