Sailor Moon: Girls Unite – The End of Jadeite review

Jadeite gets what's coming to him in this episode 13 of classic Sailor Moon. Here's our review.

Having finally had enough, Jadeite straight up calls the Sailor Senshi out to fight him, knowing full well that if he screws this last chance up, Beryl will likely kill him. The big showdown takes place at the airport, and Moon, Mercury, and Mars put up a good fight, though a well timed helping hand from Tuxedo Mask doesn’t hurt. Our masked man seems done for just long enough to piss our girls off to the point of supreme ass-kicking, but later turns out to be okay enough to leap off into the distance with panache. Jadeite, however, does not fare so well. He gets his ass roundly kicked by the Sailor Senshi, and while he does come back to Beryl with some useful information (the identities of the Sailors), she doesn’t want to hear it and condemns him to eternal sleep, handing his job over to another of her generals, Nephrite.

Okay, I have a major problem with any girl power series having a guy come in, refer to the heroines as “helpless,” and proceed to try and save them. Even if the girls openly scoff at Jadeite’s sexism and kick his ass two minutes later, having Tuxedo Mask, their number one male ally, not really respect their abilities that much? Not okay. At all.

Other than that, though, this episode was… I mean, it was okay. I’d probably rate it higher if I gave a crap about Jadeite, but I don’t.  His death meant nothing to me. The other generals either have some story of redemption or are at least humanized just enough for their deaths to be somewhat tragic. Jadeite was just a dick. And then he died. Boooooooooo big deal.

It’s ironic that, considering how ultimately unimportant he is, how disconnected he is emotionally from the both the protagonists and his fellow antagonists, his tenure as Beryl’s go-to general is the longest of the four. Perhaps her patience wore thinner and thinner with each subsequent general, but it’s far more likely that it was done to create a sense of status quo and not muddle the assembly of the power trio with a change in adversaries. All true, but did we need thirteen episodes worth? Hardly.

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Sadly, Jadeite was never that interesting a character, and it’s a shame we never saw him interact with the other Shitennou. Zoisite interacts with both Nephrite and Kunzite during his run, and while Kunzite doesn’t appear to Nephrite, he casts his shadow over that entire arc. Jadeite is pretty much off on his own. I’d have liked to have seen his interplay with the others, because it would have further illuminated his character beyond being a misogynist asshole, but unfortunately, on this count, Jadeite totally gets the short end of the stick. As stated above, he was a dick. And then he died.

Which, while we’re on the topic, came as a surprise to no one because of the god-fucking-damn titles. You know, I wonder if this is a cultural thing, if plot twists aren’t considered that important in Japan, because I see this shit all over anime. Maybe it’s because they assume viewers of the anime have read the manga? But even then, it’s an adaptation. It’s changed and won’t necessarily do things in the same way, so why spoil it? Even if you know Jadeite dies, you don’t necessarily know he’s going to die in this episode. Oh, until you see the freakin’ title card, or in this case, the link to the video. Sigh… whatever. I’ve got bigger fish to fry, but this will be noted again with future episodes where the offense is even more grievous.

One last note: Wow, Beryl. Way to be a stupid bitch. I mean, kill him if you want, but get his intel first. That is some short-sighted bullshit right there. See that, Little Miss Temper? That is why Sailor Moon will kill you.

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2.5 out of 5