Rick and Morty Season 4: Ranking the Best Mortys

In addition to being one of the funniest shows on television, Rick and Morty is also a shockingly interesting and cohesive sci-fi adventure. Creators Justin Roiland and Dan Harmon know that if you’re introducing a character as the smartest human (or any other creature really) in the universe, that means he’s gonna have to do some smart stuff. In this instance “smart stuff” means knowing that there are infinite universes and inventing a portal gun to access them all.

For all of Rick and Morty’s sci-fi bonafides, its acknowledgement of infinite universes is probably the coolest one. Infinite universes means that anything can/will/did happen. On a bad show this would create a sense of the story not mattering. On a good show this creates a sense of exciting, infinite creative possibilities. Rick and Morty puts its infinite universes to great, creative use. How could we live without knowing there is a universe where the landscape is made of butts farting noxious fumes?

Infinite universes mean infinite possibilities. Most importantly infinite universes means infinite Ricks and infinite Mortys. Over the course of three seasons we’ve encountered many different iterations of Rick and Morty. The Ricks are mostly the same: infinitely intelligent douchebags who care about themselves so much they create and inter-dimensional council of Ricks. Mortys on the other hand are almost always lovable goofballs wearing different outfits. So in the spirit of honoring infinite universes and the arrival of Rick and Morty season 4, we’ve developed a list of our favorite Mortys to ever appear onscreen.

read more – Rick and Morty Season 4: Characters We Want to See Again

Of course infinite universes means infinite Mortys so we’re unable to make a list ranking them all. Any Morty that we could conceive of technically must exist because the number of Mortys is technically infinite.

So we’ll just be counting Mortys that have appeared on the show. That excludes Mortys from the expanded comic book universe (there are five of them according to the Rick and Morty wiki) and also any and all Pocket Mortys from the mobile game. As of this writing there were 178 Pocket Mortys available (177 actually if we assume the first generic Morty players collect in-game is the “original” C-137 Morty).

That still leaves quite a few Mortys who have appeared canonically onscreen during an episode of Rick and Morty . Here is our ranking of the 20 best. What are the qualifications that makes a good Morty? Don’t worry about it.

20. Cowboy Morty

Why is Cowboy Morty #20? Because cowboys suck. Let’s never speak of this again.

19. Alien Morty

Just like Cowboy Morty and many other Mortys on this list, Alien Morty first pops up in the season 1 penultimate episode “Close Rick-Counters of the Rick Kind.” Alien Morty is just a quiet little fella with three eyes. We do not like this. All Mortys should have two eyes.

18. Cyclops Morty

Um, did we stutter? ALL MORTYS SHOULD HAVE TWO EYES.

17. Robot Morty

Robot Morty pops up in “Close Rick-Counters” as well thought he’s also a collectible character in Pocket Mortys. Robot Morty appears low on this list just because it’s not quite clear what’s going on with his hair. Is that a helmet or actual hair? Plus he looks a little too much like the Tin Man.

16. Artist Morty

Artist Morty would appear much higher up on the list if we just knew what the little guy was painting? The council of Ricks must be keeping him around for a reason. What does he like to paint? Muscle-bound Ricks atop noble steeds?

15. Antenna Morty

Hey, a Morty with a speaking line! This Morty is trapped in the evil Rick’s dungeon along with dozens of other Mortys. When C-137 Morty speaks up to lead a revolution, Antenna Morty reveals that it’s his life’s sincerest mission “to write really crazy, intense action novels.” That’s a good Morty.

14. Replacement Morty

This poor Morty was exploded to death by his stupid Rick. Morty C-137 replaces him and buries him in the backyard after his own world is Cronenberged. This Morty cracks the top ten for nobly (yet unwittingly) giving his life in pursuit of wacky sci-fi adventures.

13 – 9. Stand By Me Mortys

In “Tales from the Citadel,” the show introudces seemingly thousands more background Mortys. The best by far, however, are these four little dudes who seem to have an analogue to the four kids from Stand By Me. The group includes Lizard Morty, Glasses Morty, Slick Morty, and the heft Left-Handed Morty.

8. The One True Morty

Have you heard the good news, friend? One day he will return and lead the Mortys into paradise. The One True Morty seems like he would be the best Morty at face value. Problem is he might just be fictional. We’ll put him at #8 to hedge our bets.

7. Hammerhead Morty

This Morty wants to be known for more than just having a hammer for a head. Unfortunately, it’s kind of hard to look past the hammer. Fortunately, hammers are pretty rad.

6. Evil Morty

You want a real One True Morty? Look no further than this evil guy. Evil Morty wears an eyepatch just to cover the transmitter concealed behind it that is mind-controlling an evil Rick. To what ends is this evil genius manipulating Ricks and torturing other Mortys? That remains to be seen. For now all we know that this Morty is not to be trifled with.

5. Eric Stoltz Mask Morty

Eric Stoltz Mask Morty is much more than just a wildly creepy face. For starters, he is Doofus Rick’s assigned Morty since Doofus Rick never had any kids of his own. He comes from a world in which everyone is Eric Stoltz Mask people.

What exactly is an Eric Stoltz Mask person? Remember the non-Jim Carrey 1985 movie Mask?  Oh you don’t? Here’s what Eric Stoltz looks like in it.

Eric Stoltz Mask Morty is also a subtle allusion to how Eric Stoltz was originally cast as Marty in Back to the Future.

4. Morty C-137

Here is our “generic” Morty. He’s the Morty of Rick and Morty fame. He’s a pretty solid Morty but also kind of a buzzkill. C’mon, Morty, just let grandpa sell arms to assassins and political dissidents without being a whiny brat about it.

3. Long Sleeved Morty

Morty C-137 really should have been paying more attention when walking around the Council of Ricks space station. If he saw this Morty, effortlessly rocking long sleeves, he would have immediately understood that it’s a far superior look.

2. Cronenberg Morty

Every tragedy has a silver-lining. Yes, it’s bad that Rick’s creation of a love potion accidentally turned almost everyone on planet Earth into bloodthirsty Cronenbergian monsters and that Rick and Morty had to abandon said reality for another one. But this Cronenberg universe meant that poor Cronenberg Rick and Cornenberg Morty now have a new universe to call their home. Get settled in, Cronenberg Morty – you’re safe now.

1. Lawyer Morty

Lawyer Morty is the best Morty by such a wide margin that it’s almost pointless for any other Morty to exist. I mean, look at the little guy go.

We would happily see his pog collection anytime.

Alec Bojalad is TV Editor at Den of Geek and TCA member. Read more of his stuff here. Follow him at his creatively-named Twitter handle @alecbojalad