Reviews

How I Met Your Mother: Something New, Review

The Season Finale of HIMYM and......... WE SEE HER! BUT .... Well, read on.

By Lisa Bernier | May 14, 2013 | | 0

Huh.

So, for all you that watched, I’ll just say that the OMG moment at the end was more of an omg moment for me, mostly due to the mediocre quality of the episode as an episode, as a season finale, and, oh yeah, NOTHING HAS BEEN WRAPPED UP.

That said, we did finally get to see the face of the mother. She’s cute, and totally looks like someone Ted would end up with. She also looks nothing like Robin, which is a plus.

Ugh. Robin and Ted. Ted and Robin. Robin and Barney. Barney and Robin. Ted and Barney. Barney and Ted. When will this triangle finally be over????

Apparently, not until Season 9 since we didn’t even get to the freakin’ wedding in the episode.

Oh HIMYM, there’s dragging things out for a big payoff, and then there’s just dragging. Seriously. Watch New Girl for pointers on how to wrap up storylines in a satisfactory yet completely awesome manner.

Anyways, most of the episode is consumed by Ted-woe-is-me still trying to get over Robin. Remember last episode? The locket? The rain? The holding hands moment?

Yep. And I hope most of you had the same collective, “NOT AGAIN GET OVER HER ALREADY” moment that I had when I watched last week.

Apparently, Ted hasn’t gotten over it in this episode yet. Again, we have to wait for Season 9.

And this is the problem I had with the entire episode in a nutshell. It was all setup, setup, setup, emo Ted, more setup, setup, setup, emo Ted, setup, omg moment end.

Don’t get me wrong, I get it: if Season 9 is to be the last season, then they have to set the gears in motion for it to be legen—wait for it—DARY. Yeah. Bro high five?

Still, it gets frustrating to watch a show basically go “ho hum, wasting time before we get to the good stuff” for their season finale. It makes me feel less than enthusiastic its return. I mean at least then I know it will finally BE the last, and at the end of the season it will be over and done with.

See, these are not the feelings I want to have about a television show. I want to love it. I want to wait for it with bated breath. I want to be like, “OMG Can you believe did you see wtf it happening????” I do not want my reaction to be: “….huh.”

Anyways, so Robin and Barney spend most of the episode being lovey dovey before their wedding. In typical Robin and Barney fashion, they end up meeting their couple nemesis, and therefore plot to break the couple yet. They only succeed in getting the couple engaged, which they end up feeling is a win after all. Smooch smooch, kiss, kiss, married awwww moments blah blah blah.

Meanwhile Marshall and Lily pack up for Italy. Then they get a phone call from Marshall’s mom, who he forgot to tell about the whole heading to Europe thing. She demands to see the baby before they leave. He heads off to the airport for a short visit, and Lily decides to take a trip out to check out Ted’s now finished house. You know, the one he bought that was all beat up and has slowly been re-doing? Yep. That house. It’s done.

Of course, when she pulls up to the house, she is astonished by the For Sale sign in front of it. She confronts Ted. Turns out, he’s moving to Chicago because Robin’s getting married to Barney, blah, blah, blah we get it, you’re clearly still not over her.

Then Lily has a panic attack that Marshall’s mom will prevent their Italy move. She calls him. He assures her nothing will stop them from having their Italian adventure. Of course, right after he says that and hangs up, he gets another call offering him a judgeship.

See what I mean? Set up.

Then, of course, Ted tells Lily the locket story and Lily tells Ted she knows where the locket is. Turns out, when Ted was going to marry Stella, Robin got drunk, dug it up, and put it somewhere. She moved to Japan because she couldn’t handle Ted getting married. She still has it—wait, no she doesn’t. Ted has it, because where she put it is something he has.

Ted gets all excited and goes, “this is the perfect wedding gift!” Lily looks at him with sad, “uh-oh” eyes. We all know Ted’s going to do something stupid and get his heart crushed. Again.

Of course, then we have shots of everyone heading out to Farhampton to the wedding. Ted has to go right back to the city after, since he’s moving to Chicago the next day. How will he get back? Oh, he’ll take the train.

Cut to the train station with “Farhamptom” stop coming up on the board. Cut to yet another shot of the mother’s legs. Cut to yet ANOTHER shot of the mother’s legs. More build up, build up, build up, yadda yadda yadda. Yes, we see the instrument case. Yes, we remember she’s a musician at Robin’s wedding. Yeah, yeah, yeah.Can I just say we didn’t even get to see a wedding this episode? That was all I wanted! A wedding! With dresses and flowers and pretty but shitty tasting cake. I want to see Robin and Barney get married god damn it, because overall, their story has been way more interesting and compelling than Ted’s, well, anything.

And while I was on this diatribe in my mind, the camera panned up to a shot of the mother’s face. A brunette, cute, not really known actress. Ok. Fine. That’s nice. We got to see her.

Then the episode ends.

Oh, HIMYM, I wish you could still make me care. But I’m afraid, after all this time, this relationship has grown cold. You’re just going through the motions. I’m just going through the motions. Let’s call it quits before we hate each other, huh?

God, why does this show have to have one more season????