Haven season 4 episode 6 review: Countdown

This week's Haven makes Rachael wish a spin-off movie was on its way. Here's her review of Countdown...

This review contains spoilers.

4.6 Countdown

This week’s episode hinged on the ‘specialness’ of Troubled people – triggering our killer Trouble of the Week – with the common thread that parents are developing a school for ‘normal’ kids where kids from Troubled families aren’t allowed.

I’m going to get opinionated here but I can see the sense in creating a school for non-Troubled children away from the public schools. While some of the Troubles are harmless like Jeanine from the Reunion whose Trouble made everything she ate turn into to cake, there is a high volume of Troubles that are deadly or least dangerous without even meaning to be.

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Don’t believe me? I can make a list. We can go through all four season if you like.

Most of the Troubles we see rack up an unintentional body count like Paul’s this week, or the firefighter whose guilt immolated innocent people offering him words of kindness; or cause severe damage like Jordan’s pain power, or Vicky the Intern whose art power can kill or take apart the town and arguably the world if she decided to draw and destroy it.

The Troubles aren’t an imagined superiority complex. We’ve seen – over and over – Troubles killing people. Troubled teenagers kill other teenagers. That’s not speculation. That’s fact. It happened last episode when the Troubled teen kill his friend and girlfriend out of revenge. We’ve seen students taking out their peers as far back as season one – notably with the firestarter who blew himself up in the end.

Parents who are scared their children will be the next to die are not irrational. If they leave them around other students who could blossom into living weapons with no way to control who they kill or how at any moment then they’re taking a real risk. This school is what those parents think is the right thing to do to protect their kids; I’m not sure they’re wrong. I wouldn’t want a hungry wendigo, an angry pyrokinetic with a hit-list, or a girl who can wish me into the cornfield (snowglobe) near my child or heck, near me. I’m sorry, I’d be terrified.

I know the writers are trying to draw a parallel to segregation but I think they failed. There’s a difference between separating people because you think one group is superior to another (a few historical examples being: black/white, boys/girls, European/indigenous) and separating one group from another because they represent a true danger to others – there are reasons most states in the US have laws that allow them to separate people who are a ‘danger to themselves and others’ from the general public. I think a more important question that the people who do side with the Troubled – Nathan and his disdain for the school in particular – should ask themselves how, exactly, is this different from every time the trio or the Guard puts the Troubled in a van or a truck and ships them out of town?

All Troubled/non-Troubled politics aside, yet again, what was far more interesting than our Troubled man (shocker), was our star attraction: Haven‘s relationships. Jordan’s exit was unfair but she bowed out a rockstar. Cristian Carmago brought Wade the same underlying creeper vibe he had as Rudy seducing Deb back in season one of Dexter as he wormed his way into Jordan’s gloves to find out about the Crocker Legacy. Jordan brought us some serious insight – to herself and Vince of all people before Wade friggin’ stabbed her. Vince! He has a Trouble! He had a wife! What? I want to know more.

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I just hope Duke finds out about what Wade did and brings the justice. Speaking of my favorite pseudo-pirate, oh my heart, it cannot take Duke and Nathan this episode. Love each other more, boys. Oh wait. You can’t. They brought the high-octane affection for each other this episode. Nathan didn’t forget that Duke loves Audrey too and instead of there being a jealous spat, he comforted him. I lost the ability to be calm right there. Then it got worse at the station because Duke doesn’t want to lose Nathan, he wishes he could stop caring but he can’t. The prospect is as unacceptable to him as it is to Audrey and the pain in his face is a mirror of hers and we know she loves Nathan – she says as much. It’s an “If A, Then B” proof that makes me apoplectic with emotions.

Speaking of Audrey, the moment Nathan realized Lexie was in fact Audrey was crippling. His voice when he said “Parker?” hopeful but choking on fear was perfectly executed by Lucas Bryant. Getting what you wanted and knowing it means the end of all things shouldn’t be wrapped up in a name but he manages it and that’s acting. Dang. I loved Audrey being mad at him for insisting she kill him though. Self-advocacy thy name is Audrey. She loves him, so its her choice. She will not be manipulated or forced. The end.

Which begs the question – oh my God, why won’t you two make-out already? You had a kid together. You have said you’re in love with each other. Don’t force me to pull out that picture of stick figures mashed together proclaiming “NOW KISS” because so help me I will. Things are that desperate. Although, given that Duke and Nathan’s always intense emotional connection is escalating yet more, I’m beginning think happily ever after could be Audrey, Nathan, Duke, and Jennifer living in some sort of hippy love-rhombus on the outskirts of town. There’s no way to know until someone nuts up and makes a move already.

Read Rachael’s review of the previous episode, New Girl, here.

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