Game of Thrones: Winners & Losers – Season 7 Finale
Hold back your tears, the final Game of Thrones: Winners & Losers of the season is here.
The Game of Thrones is a deadly one, and like all good games, it has winners and losers. Welcome to Game of Thrones: Winners & Losers, where we take in the latest episode of HBO’s Game of Thrones and determine the top MVP’s as well as those who were handed a healthy dose of defeat.
Below you’ll find the winners and losers for Game of Thrones, Season 7, Episode 7, “The Dragon and The Wolf.” If you find your favorite character listed as a loser, just remember that the tides on Game of Thrones are always shifting; I swear it by the Old Gods and the New.
*Spoilers for the latest episode of Game of Thrones below*
WINNERS
1. The Night King
Perched atop the Blue Eyes Wight Dragon, the Night King had his new pet huff and puff and blow The Wall down. Now, the Night King is free to lead his Army of the Dead down through Westeros, picking up new ranks along the way. The Night King and the impending doom that he represents has hijacked Game of Thrones. All of this business about politics, prisoners, castles, and crowns, none of it matters much anymore, which has been sort of bad for the show, but speaks volumes for this guy’s power. The threat that the Night King poses brought almost all of our major characters to one location for the first time since episode one, so he deserves points for that as well. Right now, the Night King is undefeated and about to run up the score quite a bit more before his time is done.
2. Jaime Lannister
It’s been a rough season for Jaime Lannister. Without recounting every L that he’s taken this year, essentially he’s been stuck fighting on the losing side of war, in more than one way. Sure, up against Dany, her horde of Dothraki, and dragons it’s clear he’s been backing the wrong horse, but also in his relationship with his sister (who is also his lover) he’s frequently belittled and ignored. Ever since he has lost his hand, Jaime has been slowly inching his way toward a conscious and tonight it finally materializes when he decides to honor his sister’s word, join the right side of history, and fight with the living against the dead in the North, appearing to break up with his sister in the process. There’s only room for one incestous relationship at a time on this show, apparently. Finally seeing Cersei’s illogical hatred for what it is, Jaime ends the season a winner. Don’t call it a comeback!
3. Tyrion Lannister
Season 7 was unkind to this Lannister as well. His machinations led to the Unsullied being trapped at Casterly Rock, the Tyrells and Dornish being eliminated from Dany’s ranks, and their fleet of ships being destroyed. After that, his ideas and protestations of Dany’s more wicked tendencies fell on deaf ears. That’s why I’m giving the Imp some recognition for pulling tonight off. Not only did he orchestrate a meeting between his evil sister and his new queen, but everyone made it out alive! That’s a near miracle on this show. He also walked into Cersei’s office and egged her on to kill him. Everything we’ve heard and seen would indicate that this would be a horrible plan, that Cersei absolutely would delight in slaughtering her brother, but Tyrion reads the situation correctly and is unharmed. To top it all off, he (seemingly) was able to convince Cersei to dedicate men to the living’s cause. You have to take your victories where you can get them.
4. Sansa and Arya Stark
The Winterfell storyline from these last few episodes was painfully annoying, with both Stark girls acting irrationally and against the character development that they had built prior to this point. Luckily, that was all a bit of misdirection, and the two lady wolves teamed up to take Littlefinger out. Littlefinger was solely responsible for causing their family so much pain, it surely was satisfying watching him bleed out before their eyes. With Bran sitting by their side, they blindsided Littlefinger, leading him to literally plead for his life. The lone wolf dies in winter, but the pack survives. I’m so glad that these lone wolves are running together these days. Actresses Sophie Turner and Maisie Williams seem like such buds in real life, I’m glad they can finally put that chemistry to good use on screen.
5. Samwell Tarly
The College Dropout Samwell Tarly arrived in Winterfell this week and proved that he doesn’t need no schoolin’ to be the smartest guy in the room. After listening to acid casualty Bran dump exposition and literally talk about how he knows everything, Sam gets to drop a “Well, actually…” keying Bran into the fact that Rhaegar Targaryen had an annulment. Can we just pause and go over that one more time?
Bran: I’m the Three-Eyed Raven. I can see everything. I know everything. Jon Snow is actually Jon Sand.
Sam: Well actually, Rhaegar had an annulment.
Bran: Wait…really?
If you prove the Three-Eyed Raven wrong, you’ve won.
read more: Game of Thrones Season 8 Predictions and Theories
LOSERS
1. Jon Snow
Humor me, if you will. I get it; Jon Snow (seemingly) convinced Cersei to support his Great War and no one died in the process. This season, we found out Jon could truly lead and he successfully made believers out of every person he encountered that the Long Night was real and currently happening. He’s got all of the best characters in his corner, plenty of Dragonglass, and the two dragons at his disposal. Everything would tell you that this guy was a winner this season, until we got to that scene with Sam and Bran. I’m sorry, but Jon is the biggest loser this week because we saw him have sex with Daenerys intercut with a flashback revealing that the two are nephew and aunt. You can’t hook up with someone while juxtaposed with information revealing you’re committing incest! You just can’t, ok? Some found their love scene steamy, but I couldn’t help but hear a sad trombone playing throughout it. You thought Jon Snow could brood? Wait to you see him after he finds out who is parents are and puts two and two together.
2. Cersei Lannister
Cersei might have been genuinely scared by that wight, but not scared enough to stop being an irrational, power-hungry monster. With her three children dead, all Cersei is living for is power. Determined to be as pragmatic, ruthless, and successful as her father, Cersei is ignoring the fight for humanity just to claim a few more castles. Though she agreed to send troops to the North, Cersei instead plans on holding her forces back and retaking the lands she’s lost. Unable to grasp the fact that there won’t be people left to rule, Cersei’s finally driven away Jaime, the last real relationship left in her life. Bitter, alone, and ultimately doomed, Cersei is a Queen without anyone in her court, and eventually will be without any subjects too.
3. Littlefinger
Chaos is a ladder and our boy just fell off of it. It’s a bad last look for the biggest schemer in the game to get so thoroughly punked. It was never going to end well for Littlefinger, you can’t play all of those sides and burn all of those bridges without expecting to get got, but I envisioned that Baelish would go farther than this. The Stark girls set him up and he was left dumbfounded. He was so shocked, he looked like the Blinking White Guy meme. He then preceded to lie, beg, and cry for his life before having his throat slit like a pig. Littlefinger may have got what he deserved, but I would have rather seen him sent through the Moon Door. Just sayin’.
4. The Wall
I’m lumping Beric Dondarrion and Tormund Giantsbane into this entry as well, because they’re either dead or left in a pile of rubble that the Army of the Dead is marching on. Chekhov’s Wall, you know, the one we’ve heard was near indestructible and the only thing holding back the White Walkers, has been destroyed. Viserion, Dany’s dead dragon reanimated by The Night King, blew fire? Ice? Dicyanoacetylene? I don’t know, whatever it was, it cut through the Wall like a hot knife through angel cake. Eight millennia down the tubes. It was a good run. Now your watch has ended.
5. Euron Greyjoy
I was so ready to make Euron a winner. When he looked at the wight and gave the equivalent of a big ol’ “NOPE” I was ready to praise him. He had almost exactly the same reaction any sane person would have. The dead can’t swim? Then I’m posting up on an island too! Call it cowardice; I call it savvy. Well, it turns out that Euron isn’t actually going to wait out winter in the Iron Islands, but is instead still in cahoots with Cersei and on his way to Essos to ferry the Gold Company and their elephants to Westeros. You wouldn’t have to do chores for Cersei if you just waited for the dead to get her on a beach somewhere, Euron! You’re not using your brain! Poor Gothua Jackson, now that Jaime is gone, he’s Cersei’s main squeeze. I hope he can handle all of the abuse that comes with that job.
read more: Game of Thrones Season 8 – Everything We Know
QUICK HITS
Bronn and Pod – Still probably having a drink somewhere. – WINNERS
The Hound – Took the first steps toward CleganeBowl. – WINNER
Theon – Wasting precious finale time. – LOSER
Bran – Dude, no one knows what being the Three-Eyed Raven means, use your words. – LOSER
Brienne of Tarth – Convinced Jaime to sack up. – WINNER
Daenerys Targaryen – Arriving casually late to a meeting is such a power move. – WINNER
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