Ok, so we’re on the verge of a pretty big event in the music world right now, but unfortunately I can’t really talk about it here. I’ve promised another publication my exclusive thoughts concerning this potential major happening and I wouldn’t want to create any kind of negative vibes or reason for voodoo curses. Of course I’m talking about Reba McEntire’s rumored return to Broadway. Pick up next week’s copy of The Nashville Tattler for what’s sure to be my most controversial “What’s Shakin’ In The Skillet?” column to date.
Anyway, with nothing else really goin’ on in popular music this week, I’m left to one of my weaker writing devices – scouring YouTube for weird crap and commenting on it. So, without any further adieu, enjoy this collection of people in Star Wars costumes rocking the F out. Behold the Average Joe/Jane’s shamelessness coupled with heaping doses of unnecessary, unfiltered snark:
Sleeveless Chewbacca Plays Guitar Hero – This guy is playing like the longest Rush song in the world. His sexy dance moves definitely do not increase enjoyment of this video. After a while, I started zoning out and wondering why his house was barely decorated.
Chewbacca Plays Guitar Hero While Female Yoda Dances Suggestively – Note to all women: a Yoda mask instantly negates whatever amount of sexiness you possess. The party going on in the background looks kind of weak.
Metal Chewbacca Plays Slammin’ Riffs On A Real Guitar – Why he’s jamming in a door way I’ll never know. Maybe the acoustics are better.
Chewbacca Unplugged – Filmed in someone’s driveway, in front of a minivan and a bicycle. Chewie gives up halfway through and impatiently rushes the camera. Oh, the frustrated artist.
Darth Vader & Optimus Prime Have Difficulty Getting Guitar Hero To Work – They eventually figure it out and start jamming on some prog rock. Optimus fucks it up in the end, though. I love that Darth has the voice modulator going the whole time.
Vader Gets His Blues On – Look out, Stevie Ray Vaughn! Darth Vader’s gunnin’ for your legacy! Do you think this person’s mother would be proud or ashamed if she saw this video? I mean, both the costume and the riffs are impressive. Still…it’s a guy dressed like Darth Vader playing the guitar to an empty, dimly lit room.
Chewbacca Plays An Electronic Drum Kit – Not as awesome as you’d think.
Star Wars Death Metal Band Anchorhead – I saved the best for last. These guys are a legitimately amazing death metal tribute to the epic musical work of John Williams (complete with growled dialogue from the film). As you can see in this live clip, they all wear helmets/masks. If I walked into a club and saw this, I’d orgasm a thousand times over.
I would like to take this opportunity to remind the musicians of the world that there are still several spots available in my Star Wars-themed Misfits cover band Hoth A.D. If you’re a horror punk drummer who doesn’t mind dressing like a Jawa, please get in touch with me via the DOG overlords. Hippies ok, no druggies, must be over fifteen with reliable transportation to and from Brooklyn.
Next week – something that requires a little more effort on my part.
Check out the Crawling Ear every Wednesday at Den Of Geek. The last Crawling Ear can be found here.