The Crawling Ear: Create your own Kanye West meltdown story
James celebrates Kanye West's album in his own special way...
Always fashionable and none-too-modest rapper Kanye West recently released a brand new album, 808s & Heartbreak. Supposedly this record finds Mr. West going in a strange new direction away from the hip-hop pop that made him famous. I don’t know much about that, but I do know this guy tends to freak out Bobby Knight-style any time the slightest misunderstanding occurs between him and any other member of the human race.
With that in mind, I now present an opportunity for you, the Den of Geek readers, to create your own Kanye West meltdown story, Enjoy!
Kanye West, the American rap star best known for ________________ (performing with his jaw wired shut / trying to make Jesus hip / kind of looking like Rodney Allen Rippy), stormed off stage in Des Moines last night after __________________ (the audience began booing his a capella version of Electric Avenue / a litany of sneaker malfunctions / he spotted a cloud somewhere in the sky). Confused audience members were heard to say, __________________ (“That was the worst Earth, Wind, & Fire concert I’ve ever seen!” / “The kazoo was definintely too low in the mix.” / “Can I get a refill on this Yoo-Hoo?”). West later ___________________ (took to his MySpace blog / appeared on Iowa public access / climbed to the top of the tallest building in Oskaloosa) and attempted to explain his actions. Said the musician, _____________________ (“IT’S JUST NOT FAIR THE WAY PEOPLE FORM THEIR OWN OPINIONS AND REFUSE TO ACCEPT MY ALI-LIKE GREATNESS!!!!!!” / “So, ah, how ’bout them Red Wings?” / “Anyone who knows me knows I hate gnomes with a passion.”) The venue, ________________________ (Bobby Miller’s Spork Hut / The Waif Exchange / Peanut n’ Dopeyz), has offered a full ticket refund plus _____________________ (three buckets of crawfish / a coupon for a free haircut / naked pictures of Aristotle Onassis) for all disappointed concertgoers. Opening act ___________________ (Fatty Sue & The Coronaries / Payne Plus Five / Lenny Brisco’s Testicles) refused to comment.
Happy Turkey Murder Day to those who celebrate it. See you next week, music lovers.
Check out the Crawling Ear every Wednesday at Den Of Geek. The last Crawling Ear can be found here.
Written by