10 crossovers we’d pay good money to see

Iron Man and Arnie in a porno flick? The A-Team kicking arse as puppets? What in the wide wide world of sport is going on here..?

Wooden it be nice?

Police Academy 24It seemed like such a routine day for the calamitous bunch of cops. That was until their latest recruit, Jack Bauer, joined up. It stopped Michael Winslow making those funny noises, and crime, surprisingly, dropped in a third of the time it’d ordinarily take.

Lost in SpaceOceanic flight 815 isn’t actually on an island. It’s drifting through space, with a strange robot for company. Naturally, any episode centred around Jack remains as much fun as smacking your knackers with rusty spanners.  

Chuck FinnOne minute, he’s carrying around the secrets of the world in his head. The next? He’s, er, sold down the river.

The A-Team AmericaLet’s kill all this talk of a movie or remade TV show altogether, and bring back the original cast of The A-Team, but in puppet form!  

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30 RockyBehind the scenes comedy as a group of executives and assorted insecure types go about putting together a new Sylvester Stallone film. The episode where they try and convince the public to watch it would be a classic…

Knightmare On Elm StreetRemember that kids’ TV programme, where three pre-pubescents had to guide one of their effectively-blindfolded friends around a computer generated world? Well, wouldn’t it be that bit more threatening, and add some necessary menace, if this concept was transposed into a real life horror movie? Might need to be shown after the watershed, though…Life On Mars AttacksThis time, it’s Gene Hunt who’s having the trippy dream, and aliens with big green heads quickly cut through his scepticism. Naturally, he quickly convinces said aliens to replace “ack, ack, ack” with “nonce, nonce, nonce”…

The Sarah Connor Chronicles Of NarniaIf it stops the shitty film franchise in its steps, then it’d be money well spent.

Who Wants To Be A Million Dollar BabyNot many after sitting through that film, we’d wager

Pumping Iron ManEr, perhaps we’d better stop there…

Matt’s Confused Reviews

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