Haven season 3 episode 6 review: Real Estate
Haven delivers a satisfyingly spooky haunted house episode for Halloween. Here's Rachael's review of Real Estate...
This review contains spoilers.
3.6 Real Estate
It's Halloween in Haven so of course, things are horrible and messed up (well, every day is horrible and messed up there, but this week, especially so). For a little show that is surprisingly skilled at body horror and straight-up creepiness, I came into this episode with high hopes on the scare front. I wasn't terrified, but Real Estate centered around a spooky old house with a family that went missing and odd hallways right out of a Kubrick film. It opened at a costume party and we got to see Claire the shrink dressing as a cheerleader vampire slayer a la Buffy. For fans of the actress, this was a fun Easter egg because the actress played an amnesiac cheerleader on her last soap opera role, so that was a nice nod.
So, a terrified teen draws Audrey into the haunted house - a creepy standby to which I give a resounding yes. The normally immune Audrey is knocked out, a missing boy is found bleeding from the eyes and dead behind a wall, and oh, yeah, the door's disappeared. When Tommy pulls a gun, Duke points out "Seriously? A ghost just removed the front door and you think shooting at the windows is going to help?" He's my favourite. Also, preach for commenting on Duke's ridiculous hair this season. Cut it sweetie. Just cut it.
Soon Nathan and Jordan are locked in the spook house too, with the Teagues and Dwight stuck on the outside - completing the Haven Scooby Gang. I love a good locked room murder. Even better when the house is alive and this episode hits both of those tropes really solidly. It was all a little reminiscent of the recent Doctor Who episode The God Complex, Iain Glenn (Game of Thrones' Jorah Mormont) plays a troubled man who became the house and then moved it around to get what he wanted/needed.
The Jordan/Nathan arc continues with her finally finding out about Nathan's investigation and Nathan discovering that hey, Jordan tortured some guy into oblivion - literally. I genuinely like her as a character but the entire thing feels awkward to me. I'm not keen on romantic relationships mired in intrigue of the emotional kind. Drama, danger, even the time limit Audrey has - I'm cool with that. I am not, however, super enthusiastic about this one - even if Nathan did come clean about his original intentions. Somehow that doesn't make it better. Possibly it's the shadiness of it, and possibly it's the fact that I still feel like Jordan's being manipulated - he's kissing her and flirting with her but we know that he loves Audrey. He's come out and said so. I feel like Jordan deserves so much better, considering the moment before he kisses her, we see him emotionally overwhelmed by Audrey. Everyone involved does.
Finally we're getting to see some seventies Lucy and it's amazing. The wig is awful but I'm enjoying Lucy the person. The Teagues give a little info too. They were there for the previous Lucy visit which was almost fatal. We also finally get to see the Colorado Kid/James Coogan. We have a name and identity and we've seen him in person now and he reminds me of Nathan in a big bad way - with the layers and the plaid and the everything. At least she has a type? I do love the connection between Lucy and Audrey, and the delineation and separations they're creating with each flashback and connection.
Mostly, I just want the old Nathan back. I'm so tired of him accusing Duke of things with no basis. When push comes to shove, Duke still has his back - this episode included. Also, Audrey and Nathan are still hurting me with their foibles and my heart keeps breaking over them and their connection failures but at least they're talking. Not like they used to though, because everything's all wrong. I just wish I knew what needed to happen to fix things. We're at the halfway point and that's my big question for the back end of the season.
Read Rachael's review of the previous episode, Double Jeopardy, here.
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