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Top 10 totally wasted film franchises

Mark Pickavance


Some film franchises take off and earn lots and lots of dollars. Others crash at the very first hurdle. Mark picks the ten worst offenders...

Published on Sep 17, 2007

Counting down from the top, here are my ten most disappointing attempts to convert some prior source material into new film franchise.

10. Catwoman (2004)

I’d read a few negative comments about this production before I saw it, but little prepared me for how utterly dreadful it is. What confused me entirely was that the title suggests a connection to the Bob Kane character, but what’s presented in it has as much to do with him as the carton series Top Cat. And, any delusions that winning an Oscar gives you some protection when you make a turkey soon evaporated for Halle Berry when this opened.

9. Van Helsing (2004)

This one is a bit weird, because it draws on the work of Bram Stoker, Mary Shelly and others, but curiously the Van Helsing in this movie isn’t the one that’s detailed in the Dracula book. The true source material is the 1930s Universal Studio monster movies, but whatever the origins it stunk. Much of the movie is entirely unwatchable as there is very little logic or connection between progressive scenes. Had Stephen Sommers given it the light and deft touch he’d used on the first Mummy movie it could have easily been a whole new outlet for Hugh Jackman, but instead he used his mallet of sloppy film making to entirely trash it.

8. The Young Sherlock Holmes (1985)

With Barry Levinson directing, assisted by Frank Marshal, Steven Spielberg, and Henry Winkler producing, and the entire wealth of Conan Doyle’s archetypal detective Holmes, how could it go wrong? Big time, I’d suggest. I can’t really blame the cast, most of whom seemed well suited to their character roles, with Nicholas Rowe being very good as the young Holmes. But parts of this production play like a weird Victorian version of the Goonies. It was an interesting premise, actually contradicted by Doyle’s own work, but ultimately an attempt to start a franchise that failed miserably.

7. The Saint (1997)

There are parts of this movie I enjoy, but what’s it got to do with the Leslie Charteris character? Not much from what I can recall of the novels, 1940s George Sanders movies and his later TV incarnations with Roger Moore and Ian Ogilvy. The entire premise - that The Saint was once a man who lived on the wrong side of the law, but has chosen to fight crime - seems entirely lost in this movie with Val Kilmer making the Roger Moore's eyebrow acting seem positively expressive. The limp performance of this Saint at the global box-office means this franchise will need at least three miracles to be resurrected.

6. Lost in Space (1998)

It looked like converting this icon of 1960s TV for the big screen would be a challenge. And that's just how it turned out to be. Personally I love some of the design work in this production, but the performances of the actors and the script are not remotely up to the job. This was Matt LeBlanc’s only real stab at movie stardom, and it fell entirely flat, much like his career. Danger Will Robinson, this franchise is lost...

5. The Avengers (1998)

With what looked like interesting casting, and some amazing source material, this could have been fantastic. But instead it was an utter fiasco, the likes of which I’m still coming to terms with. Sir Sean Connery should have kept the teddy bear outfit on for the whole dreadful proceedings and claimed he was never in it.

4. Æon Flux (2005)

If you’ve never seen the original animated version of this, created by Korean American animator Peter Chung, then you missed plenty, as it’s a curious blending of the stylised science fiction popularised by ‘Heavy Metal’ and hardcore animé. But the film version carries virtually none of these qualities with any success, and is a wholly abysmal celluloid experience despite having the stunning Charlize Theron in the lead roll. In most episodes Æon dies at the end, but this franchise was the fatality here.

3. Planet of the Apes (2001)

This is an almost unique scenario where an amazing film spawns a franchise that then is run into the ground. Then years later it’s relaunched and crashes a the first hurdle. Given the advances in effects since the 1968 original this could have been something special, but they appear to have started this movie without a script, and it ended before they’d rectified that. What didn’t help was people asking director Tim Burton what it was actually about and him replying ‘What do you think it’s about?’, while being interviewed to promote this drivel. Amazing potential, flushed down the toilet of film franchise.

2. Judge Dredd (1995)

While Arnhuld was the obvious choice for Dredd not too many people winced when they heard it had gone to Stallone, but they positively recoiled when they saw what had become of this British comic classic. In a film that swayed wildly between comic camp and a cop buddy actioner, it managed to avoid hitting any of the potential target audience that enjoyed the comic, or science fiction for that matter. A mess of a movie where the events make little sense, and the characters would appreciate being one dimensional. I’d love to blame Rob Schneider, but he’s just gristle in the meat grinder that is Judge Dredd.

1. Thunderbirds (2004)

Given the richness of the source material, this was a diabolical trashing of a franchise almost without precedent. Despite the potential to tap into an adult audience, like Transformers, Jonathon Frakes focused instead on the child friendly aspects, making the kids the leads. Too many kids, too many characters, not enough Thunderbirds action and Ben Kingsley playing Widow Twankie. The end result; a complete turkey. You might have directed the best Trek movie of recent times, but please Mr Frakes, stay away from any other of my childhood memories.

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Re: Top 10 totally wasted film franchises
Posted By simonbrew 1 September 17, 2007 11:04:29 AM

On Judge Dredd: surely, surely Clint Eastwood would have been the perfect casting? Interesting how Danny Cannon has gone on to make himself a decent career to, adding fuel to the theory that he didn't do much of the directing of Dredd himself in the end...

Re: Top 10 totally wasted film franchises
Posted By Ian_Osborne 1 September 17, 2007 12:01:02 PM

You could only do Judge Dredd 'properly' by casting a promising unknown in the role and never show his face. A star actor would be unlikely to agree to this limitation, and it would be a waste of his salary anyway. And without a big-name star in the lead role, the project wouldn't get the funding. So I guess we'll never get a decent Judge Dredd film until someone does it in CGI... If you come at it with few expectations the movie wasn't that bad, but the scriptwriter and director seem to have spent more research time watching Lethal Weapon than they did reading 2000AD.

Re: Top 10 totally wasted film franchises
Posted By twosheds 1 September 17, 2007 12:05:56 PM

As a kid in the late 70s I had the Eastwood Dredd all planned out - it would have been great, but by 1982 the Star Wars goldrush was over and it no longer had a chance of being made. I personally love Cannon's Judge Dredd ; it was actually far too faithful to the visual style of the comic book and yes, it has some dreadful acting (particularly from Armand Assante, who was so good with Stallone in Paradise Alley )but it also had at least some of the savage fascist humour left (most of it had already been plundered by the creators of Robocop , who openly admit it). Apart from Young Sherlock Holmes , which I thought was good fun, I agree with most of these.

Re: Top 10 totally wasted film franchises
Posted By picknmix 1 September 17, 2007 03:00:58 PM

Three other films nearly made it into this list, which for various reasons I left out. The first was The Rocketeer, which I think deserved another shot, but the boxoffice takings didn't agree. Another was 'The Shadow', and the final one was 'The Phantom' with Billy Zane. But none of these was so bad (ok, maybe the Phantom was...) that they've destroyed the potential for a sequel or reboot at some point.

Re: Top 10 totally wasted film franchises
Posted By Ian_Osborne 1 September 17, 2007 03:11:43 PM

I was surprised The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy wasn't there, nor, perhaps, V for Vendetta . On a more obscure level, how about the 1976 King Kong remake? It's generally derided, and it was 30 years before Peter Jackson rescued it with a better-received third remake.

Re: Top 10 totally wasted film franchises
Posted By Liberace 1 September 18, 2007 05:35:10 PM

I agree about the Hitchhiker's guide. The orignal TV series pi**ed all over the movie and it probably had about 0.01% of the budget. If you're going to count King Kong as a franchise then you could also argue that Star Wars Epiosdes 1-3 was a criminal waste of the single most gold-plated franchise opportunity of all time....

Re: Top 10 totally wasted film franchises
Posted By Mitchell 1 October 28, 2008 05:46:37 PM

The Americanized Godzilla comes to mind - not so much for the reimagined monster, but for the sheer lack of fun that $100,000,000 didn't even bother to rent.

Re: Top 10 totally wasted film franchises
Posted By badfox1 1 May 9, 2009 09:09:28 PM

I concur re V for Vendetta. For me, it was the sheer audacity of portraying badly-caricatured English people (slobby, sitting in the pub all day, and anyone without a cut-glass accent says "bollocks" all the time. Oh and Stephen Fry is the token gay) then selling it back to our country and expecting us to like it. I was insulted and wanted my money back!! Utter rubbish.

Re: Top 10 totally wasted film franchises
Posted By jinste 1 June 7, 2009 05:19:44 PM

you probably could call king kong a franchise.Think about it-there was the awesome original(still the best).That was followed the same year by Son of Kong,which most people dont even know exists.In the 60s there was the dire Japanese man-in-monkey-suit efforts like King Kong-vs-Godzilla and King Kong Escapes.Then in the 70s was the abysmal official remake,which some buffoon decided was worthy of a sequel,the even worse King Kong Lives.Then in the naughties we have Peter Jacksons reasonably good stab at it.I wonder who will try next?

Re: Top 10 totally wasted film franchises
Posted By jinste 1 June 7, 2009 05:22:10 PM

Mission Impossible surely.These movies are crap.Tom Cruise is woefully miscast.
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Judge Dredd on the big screen. A franchise killer. Judge Dredd on the big screen. A franchise killer.

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