A kind of Matrix Of The Dead, Afterlife mixes mild horror with wire-fu action to produce a film that services neither genre particularly well.

You'll have to divide up the wanky American-sounding comments between Holt and Anderson, but Mulcahy can be squarely blamed for everything he says without fear of misplaced hatred

There are a couple of episodes of Seinfeld where Kramer belches, and it's unmistakably my belch. My wife even recognises it. She says 'oh my God honey, that's your belch!'

I've not seen Alien Vs. Predator: Requiem, and though I'm always ready to be pleasantly surprised, the smart money is on it being utter shit,

Resident Evil: Extinction knows what it is. It knows who its audience is. And it's out to have fun, safe in the knowledge that as long as Milla keeps kicking things, people will keep buying tickets.