After Gina explodes her way into the White House, she has a 20 minute fist fight with the President, who is played by Steven Seagal

Piper is so manly that he’s able to carry off the line “Get out of my sight!”, even though the guy he’s saying it to is behind him.

I think we have the public on our side, because when I went to see Big Mommas, nobody laughed. A sombre silence hung over us all.

Ivan Drago is supposed to represent cold-hearted science. Indeed, his training sees him using the best equipment, steroids and leotards available.

Call me old fashioned, but I like my robot-police hybrids to sound like they'd be able to throw a terrorist out of a third floor window.

I remember going to see Suburban Commando at the cinema and hearing annoying noises all the way through the film. They turned out to be a group of NES consoles laughing at the special effects.

There are a few victims I've seen in this franchise that look like they'd struggle to lift a sandwich, but apparently, they can beat the shit out of a homicidal maniac without breaking a sweat.

This entry is basically just an excuse to include a picture of Dolph Lundgren in his pants wielding an enormous sword. What of it?

Well, I mean, it's the Internet. I can't be held responsible for what I write on the Internet. If so, Michael Bay would have genuine cause to kill me

We've now reached a point where, regardless of what award is being accepted, the only thing less genuine than the speech being given is the face that it's tumbling out of.

You don't run a site like Den Of Geek without making a few enemies. Look in the comments section of just about any article on here and you'll notice that, no matter what we say, someone wants us dead for it

Pirates comes out in the summer. We've just finished shooting it and are working on the edit and the special effects now. It hits theatres in May. Then we're going to put together some kind of script for it, which should be done by late September.

Yes, he keeps barrels of oil lying around. Are they a fire hazard? Yes. Are they properly stored and in reasonable quantities for domestic use? No. No, they are not.

It’s difficult to imagine anyone rushing out to see a film based on me dancing around the isles of my local Iceland supermarket, like a sober Kerry Katona with better career prospects.

If I could spend all day at home sitting in my pants and an Iron Man helmet making swooshing noises because I'm pretending to fly, then I would. But it would ruin Christmas dinner for the rest of the family